Escaping a Burning Building
A Brunette, a Redhead, and a Blonde escape a burning building by climbing to the roof. The firemen are on the street below, holding a blanket for them to jump into.  The firemen yell to the Brunette, "Jump! Jump! It's your only chance to survive!" Brunette jumps and SWISH! The firemen yank the blanket away.The Brunette slams into the sidewalk like a tomato.         "C'mon! Jump! You gotta jump!" say the firemen to the Redhead. "Oh no! You're gonna pull the blanket away!" says the Redhead. "No! It's Brunettes we can't stand. We're OK with Redheads!" "OK," says the blonde and she jumps. SWISH! The firemen yank the blanket away, and the lady is flattened on the pavement like a  pancake. Finally,  the Blonde steps to the edge of the roof. Again the firemen yell, "Jump! You have to jump!"   "No way! You're just gonna pull the blanket away!" yells the Blonde."No! Really! You have to jump! We won't pull the blanket away!"   "Look," shouts the Blonde, "nothing you say is gonna convince me that you're not gonna pull the blanket away! So what I want you to do is put the blanket down, and back away from it."

Puzzle
One morning this blonde called her boyfriend and said
"Please come over and help me. I have this killer
                     jigsaw puzzle, and I can't figure out how to start
                     it."  Her boyfriend asked, "What is it a puzzle of?" The
                     blonde said: "From the picture on the box, it's a
                     tiger." The blonde's boyfriend figures that he's
                     pretty good at puzzles, so he heads over to her place.
                     She lets him in the door and shows him she has the
                     puzzle spread all over the table. He studies the
                     pieces for a moment, then he studies the box. He then
                     turns to her and says: "First, no matter what I do,
                     I'm not going to be able to show you how to assemble
                     these pieces to look like the picture of that tiger."
                     "Second, I'd advise you to relax, have a cup of
                     coffee, and put all these Frosted Flakes back in the box."
 

Running From the Police
There's a redhead, a blonde, and a brunette. They are running from the
police. They come across an abandoned barn. There are three sacks
leaning against the hay. They each get in one. Then the police barge
in and kick on the sack that had the redhead in it,and she says "Meow,
meow" so they think it's a cat. They kick the brunettes sack, and she
says "Woof, woof" They think it's a dog. And then they kick the bag
with the blonde in it and she says "Potatoes, potatoes!"
 
 

Blonde Riding Horseback
A blonde decides to try horseback riding, even though she
has had no lessons or prior experience. She mounts the
horse unassisted & the horse immediately springs into motion.
It gallops along at a steady & rhythmic pace, but the
blonde begins to slip from the saddle. In terror, she grabs
for the horse's mane, but cannot seem to get a firm grip.
She tries to throw her arms around the horse's neck, but
she slides down the side of the horse anyway. The horse
gallops along, seemingly oblivious to its slipping rider.
Finally, giving up her frail grip, she leaps away from the
horse to try & throw herself to safety. Unfortunately, her
foot has become Entangled in the stirrup & she is now at
the mercy of the horse's pounding hooves as her head is
struck against the ground again & again.
As her head is battered against the ground, she is mere
moments away from unconsciousness when...
the Wal-Mart manager runs out to shut the horse off.

Tracks
Two blondes were walking through the woods and they came to some
tracks. The first blond said "These look like deer tracks," and the other one said,
"No, they look like moose tracks!"
They argued for quite a while, in fact, they were still arguing when
the train hit them.